A winter season of re-consideration, re-direction, and re-generation
This is my second visit to this sacred city, having made a stop here in 2020 right before the pandemic on a side trip to Machu Picchu on a trip through South America my Dad. So much life has happened since then…
As I write this I am sitting at a rooftop bar in Cusco, Peru looking out over the main square filled with humans milling about, a mix of tourists and locals, and an expanse of mountains in the backdrop. It has been five months since I wrote my last newsletter update, which on some level, feels slightly disappointing.
The last letter was written from South Africa, a country I fell in love with for both its people and its landscapes, and the strange way it mirrored the complexities of my own country of origin. A history of colonization, significant challenges with economic inequality, a pervasive disenchantment with government, and dynamic and diverse cultural influences. During my three-month visit, I kept my heart open to connections or opportunities that might reveal I was meant to stay, but as my 90-day visa window closed, it was clear that it was time to leave…for now.
So, I decided to return to the U.S. to re-group, sort through some life logistics, and spend quality time with family and friends. During the fall I had decided to focus on three themes related to my professional interests: launching my vision activation coaching program, growing the partner community for Postcard Travel Club, and investigating how I could continue my work facilitating international higher education partnerships and programs. So returning to the U.S. also offered the opportunity to take some in person meetings with my various university contacts who had been generous with their time and insights in a virtual format while I was out of the country.
As I returned, an unexpected opportunity surfaced to work at the college in my hometown to help them with an initiative focused on facilitating project-based learning experience for students related to challenges identified by the local community. It was a role I had been interested in prior to my departure for my project work in Rwanda in 2021, and the fact that it was resurfacing felt like some kind of “second chance” I was being invited to consider. Maybe it was finally time to complete the hero’s journey? And yet, I also realized this international life that I had worked so hard to create over the last three years, would be sacrificed in pursuit of stability, community, and contribution if I took the position. A faculty member from Centre College encouraged me to put 30-minutes into submitting my application and see what happened, and so I did.
Returning to quality time with family and friends was one of the highlights of my U.S. stop, including sharing snow-filled adventures throughout the mountains of Steamboat Springs, Colorado with my brother.
It also commenced a serious game of internal tug of war. Conversations progressed with Postcard Travel Club after my initial six-month contract about how my involvement might continue. We had found great momentum in onboarding new property partners from over 25 countries who were committed to responsible travel, and there were new opportunities emerging for me to bring my background in Human Resources/Organizational Development to help us establish the foundation of our culture, organizational structure, and approach to formalizing operations. We also were anticipating opportunities to experiment with new forms of content that I was curious about, including more storytelling through video formats. And yet as discussions progressed to questions about whether I might be interested in assuming a full-time role once we had secured our anticipated revenue streams, I could tell there was internal resistance.
I had enjoyed the chance to invest in this project for ⅓ of my time, while having the freedom to explore my interests in coaching and international higher education with the remaining time. I also realized the flexibility of remote work was wonderful, but in my heart of hearts, I had nostalgia for the work chapters in both Nashville and Seattle where my work was very interwoven with a physical place and contributing to a local community. The paradox of choice is real, and I felt like I was at another crossroads where I was going to have to prioritize what truly mattered, at least in this season of life.
And yet, as the dominoes fell, the path forward became fairly clear. I was surprised when I was not invited to join for the on-campus interviews for the job opportunity in my hometown, but also slightly relieved. It was too far of a swing from the freedom and expansion that my life had represented in recent years. Meanwhile, we experimented with onboarding new property partners with the support of an influential leader in transformational travel, and it led to an influx of new partners from South America, where we had less of a presence. And my interest in understanding the similarities and differences in the Global South through spending some quality time in South America after my tour of Africa felt like there was a lot of energy, excitement, and momentum.
So after some time spent with my brother in Colorado, legacy friends in Nashville, and co-working with colleagues in North Georgia, I booked my one-way ticket to Peru, without much of a plan, but an intuitive pull to show up and see what happened. At this point I have been here for one month, and realized this country is HUGE, and each region has such a different flavor, personality, and landscape.
Another “peak moment” of my U.S. tour was a visit to Vanderbilt University, where I completed my graduate studies. I had the chance to speak with an undergraduate course in social entrepreneurship about my career path and current work at Postcard Travel Club. The beginnings of a year of manifesting speaking opportunities…
I have guided my own learning journey by watching biopics of admired revolutionaries from the continent, exposes about the horror of American Imperialism in Central and South America, and admirable efforts to protect and preserve the Amazon Rainforest. We have had the chance to deepen our relationship with some of our Postcard Travel Club Partners, including Amazon Planet Peru, Impactful Travel, and Inkaterra. My prayers for my visit were that I would experience protection, purpose, peace, and provision, and so far, so good.
The energy of winter hibernation, where I spent a season of reflection and re-consideration feels complete, and I am embracing the invitation to expansion that Spring inevitably offers. My next Mastermind Group Coaching offering feels ready to support women who are inspired to actualize their next vision for the chapter ahead. At Postcard Travel Club, I have deepened my experience and understanding of how to do “Organizational Activation” and support impact entrepreneurs in establishing the foundation of their culture and operations. And my higher education investigations might be leading me to explore options to design my own approach to designing a “Gap Year” program, inclusive of career development, systems thinking, cross-cultural exchange, experiential education, civic-leadership, and character development.
While there are a lot of things I feel like I have a strong “YES” for in this next season, there are also things where I have realized I have a strong “NO.” I initially enrolled in a course focused on “teams and systems coaching” to expand my ability to work with entrepreneurial leaders ready to establish their organizational approach. But after a week in the course, I ran into that familiar feeling of resistance again.
I had this intuitive sense that my involvement with the course would hold me back more than it would help me accelerate my ability to add value. I was reminded that online courses often create a lot of frustration for me, after having learned through time and experimentation how to be much more self-directed, self-paced, and creative in designing my own learning journey.
In the first quarter of 2024, I decided to focus on deepening my organizational development capacity, so I listened to one book each month, and curated conversations with leaders in those domains to complement my learning. For January I focused on the Entrepreneurial Operating System framework described in Traction, for February I focused on how to intentionally create cultures and values through “Culture by Design,” and in March, I focused on emerging thinking around “Regenerative Business.” It was enriching and fulfilling to explore these topics in a way that honored my draw to relevant frameworks and relational ways to explore their unique applications.
Discovering the Peruvian cuisine varieties during my travels has been a peak part of my experience. One of my favorite dishes has been causa, which is a spicy, potato-layered dish seasoned with aji amarillo and lime that simply melts in your mouth.
So when I was orienting myself to this new learning experience, it is no wonder that it felt rigid and overly prescriptive. And this self-actualization journey leads to me to different moments where I realize that perhaps I am my own best teacher…manager…and even lover.
It was also a great moment to reflect on if I am a no for x, then what am I a yes for? I am a yes for creative ways to engage with topics of interest, I am a yes for trusting our lived experience, AND I am a yes for supportive containers that are able to respond to our unique learning styles.
In general, I am feeling a deeper level of self-trust, less financial fear, and invitation to be the leader I was meant to be. I have had the visual of climbing a mountain as my metaphor for leadership and life. Earlier in life, I thought that leadership was being willing to stay with those who I was climbing the mountain with, and that going in front, or ahead was somehow “uncaring” or “selfish.” And yet, I come to feel more and more in my soul, that my calling in this life is to have the courage to go ahead of the “pack.” Only this way can I show people what routes are possible that they have not previously considered. And I was affirmed in a recent conversation with another female leader, that indeed “leaders go first.” Another vestige of my co-dependent programming that feels like it is ready to be shed.
So here I go, with my multi-dynamic approach to work, locale, and life, not trying to make sense of what I am drawn to, but just taking the next intuitive step, surveying the landscape, and letting it inform what is next. The tapestry of life is getting built and only with time will it become evident what I am actually building. And I am coming to accept that is okay, and also beautiful…
