Setting a foundation of unapologetic rest, eye masks, and glitter nails for 2023
Re-connected with a former colleague in Nashville who boldly claims her title as “Chief Fire Starter” at the marketing agency she started in recent years. As we continue to break down the boundaries between work and play, “networking and nails” is now one of my new favorites.
“Stop trying to live life to the fullest. It’s so last decade.” A quote I stumbled upon in the early weeks of 2023. As I read this, I took a deep exhale and felt a small Mona Lisa smile come across my face. This was followed by a conversation with my friend and co-conspirator for my first stop of my co-live tour in Nashville, who requested that the theme of our shared time be “restore.” Let’s be honest, the holidays can sadly be more depleting than renewing, due to extensive social commitments and the emotional challenges of circling back into our families' orbits, and getting back into the “swing of things” at work can feel like a bit of a chore.
The “New Year, New You” message consistently comes hard and fast when January rolls around, and the “go getter” spirit can get the best of all of us as we try to set and honor the new commitments we have made to fulfill our desired objectives for the year ahead, personal or professional. I get caught in the swirl just as much as the rest of us, and yet this year, I also kept having these synchronistic encounters as well as a quiet inner voice that continued telling me it was safe to prioritize rest over my addiction to the stress cycle and, in fact, it was essential to set the right foundation for the year ahead.
I felt conflicted, because on the one hand I felt so much energy and excitement around the clarity I had finally received for how to carry forward an upgraded vision into the material world, which included coaching, convening, connecting, and creating. And yet I knew it was necessary to take a different approach to “work” as I started putting my visions out into the world, in order to not repeat the cycle of burnout which has haunted me for most of my professional career. I must say, it was humbling and ironic that the first time I started working for myself in February 2019, I actually realized I was actually the most demanding boss of all!
In the midst of trying to strike this new sense of balance for myself, I recalled a number of conversations I had in the past six months with my “career-oriented,” high capacity friends and colleagues about how they were grappling with their own relationship to work, achievement, and even impact, especially post-pandemic, which is captured beautifully in this article, “What Comes After Ambition.” And I realized that perhaps my pull to rest was even bigger than myself.
As an HR professional for much of my career, I got to observe how the unconscious contract between employers and employees evolved over the course of the “Millenials” influences. What the previous generation(s) found through church - community, belonging, mentorship, personal growth…many in our generation started trying to find through our relationship with our workplaces.
It became our supplier of friendships, romantic partnership possibilities, a sense of family, after hours entertainment, and more. With that, of course, came higher expectations on both sides of the equation. In October of 2019, I was actively coaching high growth tech companies through how to adapt to these expectations so they could retain “top talent.” As I walked through the halls of a sexy tech company in the Bay area, I thought, these people are fully owned, mind, body, and spirit by this brand. And it gives them a great sense of comfort that all their needs are getting met, AND they get to wear a comfy hoodie to work. Some serious in loco parentis. And it was creepy.
But with the arrival of the pandemic, as with so many aspects of our social fabric, these contracts started to come into question. On an individual and collective level, we were forced to return to basics and the popularity of “hustle culture” received a definitive blow. And now that work is meeting less and less of our basic human needs, especially with the staying power of “remote work,” is it worth giving so much of our hearts and souls to these institutions anymore?
Bringing us back to the present moment, we are now at the beginning of 2023 with a pervading sense of relief that the worst of the pandemic is hopefully behind us, but still with the unconscious impacts of all the unraveling of the foundations many people have built their lives upon, which is much bigger than work contracts. It is no surprise that most of our nervous systems are still recalibrating, and a deeper knowing within all of us recognizes that the best medicine at this time is to give ourselves permission to pause and notice, before we are fully ready to make an active choice about how to reconstruct our lives.
So if you have been feeling the pull of rest as we launch into 2023, just know that you are not alone, and it is probably the very best thing you can do to access your own deeper wisdom about what magic you want to create in the plentiful months we have remaining.
Loved enjoying a “Sound Bath Meditation & Margaritas” session during my visit to Nashville as a way to support my intention to move at a bit of a slower pace through life.
Kindred Spirit Connection: Kristin Taft helps women over 50 to find vitality and turn stress to ease and fear to power and live their desired lifestyle. She recently followed her heart’s calling to move from Atlanta, GA to a small town in New Mexico. Find out more about the community she is building here.
Suggested Peak Experience: One of my fellow travelers in Portugal, Jasper Mutsaerts, has been an amazing life and business coach throughout my current transition. I am delighted to watch how he continues to elevate and support conscious entrepreneurs through his Soul Kitchen Platform. He is hosting a series of 5-day retreats in Portugal in Summer of 2023 to support entrepreneurs to clarify their vision, reboot, and magnify their impact. If you register, you will receive a 10% discount for being part of my community. Contact me at escutchfield@gmail.com for more details.
On the Reading List: I am currently working through Conversations with God as I travel between different stops. Deeply resonating with my current spiritual understanding and grateful for the referral from one of my airBnB hosts.
